Bonus: 3 things we should avoid + FREE copy of Tofe's book!
Comparing; Expecting; Attachment.
These three things are nothing but cancers to our well-being. They manifest into negative burdens that have us relying on external validation. They're not the easiest of things to remove at first but once we can stay mindful about these, it will ensure we're staying true to ourselves.
As I began my journey, I was hungry to win and make outstanding progress. I didn’t focus on how I was progressing compared to others because my journey was different than theirs. I’m only in competition with myself, which equates to ME vs. ME. It’s okay to reflect on the greats and emulate what they’ve done and the resilience they’ve acquired from great adversity, but I feel it’s not worth comparing myself to them because each of us has a much different and unique story.
You might not be the strongest, fastest, or smartest person out there, but it’s not any of those qualities that help you get the most out of life. It’s the ones who can adapt the quickest and bounce back after every fall. You may have a weird personality and still watch Disney movies, but who cares? No one is judging you. If you’re thinking you have it worse than most people, embrace it and move on.
We can all be ambitious and if you've made it this far, then I can tell you're a go-getter. The thing is, in life things don't seem to go as planned sometimes. That's why I wrote a book about this. The key here is to remove all expectations from anything we do and enjoy the uncertainty behind it. Otherwise, it's a coming from a perspective of entitlement.
The saying goes "assume nothing, expect anything."
When we do put expectations on us, especially external ones that don't really matter, it can do things to our ego, affect the way we interact with other people, and put a disingenuous chip on our shoulder.
There's love, then there's attachment. Love is the ability to appreciate and cherish the moment for what it is. Attachment is wanting to keep it forever. When we're born to death, the only thing that we take with us is our breath. Unfortunately, we can't take our friends and family with us. This is where we take things with a grain of salt and this one comes hand-in-hand with expectations. We tend to fixate an addictive urge on that thing or person.
Think of it like walking through a field of flowers. Don't rip the flowers out, but acknowledge and appreciate it for what it is. Then continue on with life.
A FREE copy of Tofe's best-selling book:
With almost 130 million books published today, there really isn’t a need for another book. Yes, there are selfish reasons to document my legacy, but the core reason I wrote this is because I genuinely knows it could get someone out of a crisis. More importantly, it could save someone from taking their own life.
The journey I’ve been on these past few years, as well as the achievements I’ve made in my endurance career, have not only shaped my character, but have saved my life, literally. So, the purpose of this book is to help anyone get out of that deadly, deep, dark rabbit hole called “adversity and suffering.” When you think you’ll never be able to come out of your situation, I will guide you in the right direction with the lessons I’ve learned. I’ve studied, tested, and retested—countless times—those “penny-dropped” philosophical moments of the greats, and I’ve come out the other side.
Essentially, I’m that war general covered with invisible calluses and scars who will guide you out of the trenches of life and rescue you from the “The Troughs of Sorrow.” Honestly, I’m deliberately putting myself into stressful situations every day so that I can really understand the mental game. I’m determined to enter that state of untapped potential, which cultivates the “superhuman” and shows that you can do it too. I truly believe there’s a greatness in all of us. We just need to learn how to tap into it.
I’m a thought leader on resilience, not on hacking the body to get you the set of abs you’ve always wanted. I’m here so you have the mental artillery to hold yourself together in case of a traumatic crisis. If you want the perfect body, I’m not your guy for that. When everyone is focused on having a six-pack body they forget that having a six-pack mind is more important.
At the end of the day, EVERYONE HAS A PLAN UNTIL SHIT HITS THE FAN, so treat this as if it’s your “Practical Resilience Bible,” so your planning is in place in advance of any crisis.